PROJECT BLAKE: Chapter 3 [Playing Cupid]

Alexander Dior Chua

Weeks passed by, and a lot of things happened already. First, biglaang umuwi si Cindy from her grandparents' house and we hangout after that. She opened up and cried out her frustrations about their family issues which I didn't bother to ask because I respect her. Second, I spent most of my days hiding from James. Damn, pinuntahan niya pa ako sa apartment ko tapos may mga dalang flowers and stuff. I'm not used to that! I'll never will.

Trust me, I felt terrible right now because of what I said in Antonio's. Why did I even say that!?

I know it's wrong of me to give him a chance, considering the fact that I'm straight and I am not ready for a relationship! Or maybe for anything.

Unless it's with Cindy though.

But I'm dying to turn him down for Pete's sake! But then again, hindi ko kaya.

He's a nice guy and we've known each other since high school. He always gives me lunch when I forget to bring mine at school. Drives me home when my bike broke. My family even knows his nickname! Plus, he bought me a limited edition of Dior shoes on my birthday because I told him that I have been wanting that for so long.

That being said, he deserves a chance right? But to what exactly?

"Uyy!"

"Ay pota!" Halos humiwalay yung kaluluwa ko nang may kumalabit sakin.

"Hahahaha! You should have seen the look on your face! Oh goodness, sumakit yung tyan ko dun. Hahaha!"

Tawang-tawang ang mokong dahil lang dun? Kinder ba to?

"Ano naman ba, Christian? Makapang-trip ka parang close tayo ah! Umalis ka nga!" Buwesit to! Aga-aga sinisira araw ko.

"Teka lang! Hahaha to naman oh parang di mabiro."

"Ano ba kasing kailangan mo?"

Tumingin siya sakin habang pinipigilan paring tumawa habang ako naman ay seryusong tinignan lang siya. Nang humupa yung tawa niya ay agaran siyang nagsabing, "You're friends with Cindy, right?"

"And?"

"She's at the gymnasium. Blake turned him down. Pinagtatawanan siya dun, kaya hinanap kita and then--"

Hindi ko na siya pinatapos at agad na tumakbo papuntang gymnasium. Anak ng yawa yang pokemong Blake na yan! Humanda lang talaga yang demonyo na yan pag nagkita kami. Lulumpuhin ko talaga yan kahit anak pa ng gobernador!

I got inside the gymnasium and saw no one. The gymnasium was quiet as a dessert.

Takte! Saang gymnasium ba yon?

So I spent almost two hours of searching for that freaking gymnasium! May tatlo kasi kami dito sa St. Ezekiel and trust me, ang lalayo nila! It took me that long to realize na hindi ko na napasukan yung first subject ko. Yes, I'm an idiot.

Why did I not realize it!? That Christian was Blake's buddy! Of course isa na naman 'to sa mga kalokohan nila. Mga abno!

So I sprint as fast as I can papuntang building namin para lang makaabot sa class ko. I don't even know what time it is.

"You're an hour and half late Mr. Chua and you dare show up in my class? Go straight to the Discipline Office! You knew that I do not tolerate this kind of behav--" Mahabang lintaya ng prof namin when I got in the room. I did not bother looking at her, but instead I looked at Blake and his gang, laughing their asses out. He was grinning like he won something while I glared at him, unti-unti siyang pinapatay sa isipan ko.

That guy! When will he grow up!?

To make things short, I got into community service.

"Cindy, you don't have to do this. Paano nalang pag may nakakita sayo na tinu-tulongan ako? You'll get yourself into trouble!"

Papunta kaming pool area ng school, kung saan may practice mamaya ang swimming club. The D.O decided na I have to clean the restroom para sa community service ko.

"No way I am leaving you, Al. We're best friends. I have to help you."

Alam ko naman 'yon. Taena kailangan pa talagang ipamukha?

"But---"

"No buts." I want to tell her that she has no obligation of helping me on my mess, pero ang tigas din ng ulo.

"Thank you."

"No worries."

I calmed down. She's right. We're best friends after all. Bakit ba kasi ang duwag ko. I just have to tell her how I feel, right?

After half an hour natapos din. Hindi naman gaano ka rumi yung restroom kaya mas madali lang yung trabaho namin. I was packing my stuff, when Cindy ask me about the El Festi.

"Next month na yun, Al. What should I wear? A gown? A dress? Wait, I'm invited right?"

"Oo naman. Tsaka it's just a simple dinner. You should be fine."

"Pero nandun si Blake. Al, I already told about my feelings for him diba? What if he won't like me?"

Sweet Mary. Heto na naman siya.

"And why is that? Ang ganda mo kaya."

Kaya nga ako nainlove sayo e. Ang ganda-ganda mo. Sa sobrang ganda naging manhid na. Jk.

"Wait, OMG!"

"What?"

"I just thought of something brilliant. Oh my god! Bakit ngayon ko lang naisip to!"

She had thought of something crazy, I know. 

"What is it?"

"Diba you're friends with Blake?"

"We were never." Why does everybody keep on saying that!

She giggled and said, "Of course. Then why don't you set us two on a date? Or find out what is his type or ideal girlfriend. Pleaseee bestfriend! PLEASEEEE."

"I don't think I could do that." Hindi kaya ng puso ko.

"Please. For me?"

Bakit palaging si Blake? Parang lahat-lahat nalang nasa kanya na. Kunti nalang talaga papatumba ko nayan. Hayst.

"Okay."

"Yey! Thank you bff!"

"But promise me that we're going to tagaytay like you said last month."

"Yun lang ba? OMG! I'll do it! I promise bff."

Good. 

Now I have to get my heart broken, again and again. Geez. 

PROJECT BLAKE: Chapter 2 [The Suitor]

 CHAPTER 2

Alexander Dior Chua

"May check-up siya sa Vet mamayang 2:00 PM, tapos nandyan nadin yung mga dog food sa bag at pati narin yung laruan niyang bola na color green. Tsaka ayaw niya palang kumain pag walang fresh milk sa food niya kaya I'll give you money nalang kasi hindi ako nakabili pagpunta ko rito." Mahabang lintaya niya sakin habang sinusuklay si Cookie, ang pomeranian niyang aso.

"'Yan lang 'yung dala mo?" Turo ko sa maliit na bag niyang nasa sofa.

"Yeah. May mga damit na kasi ako dun. Okay lang talaga sayo na iwan ko dito si Cookie?"

Napatango nalang ako kahit hindi ako ganun kahilig sa mga aso. Pa-impress din kasi ako anuba.

"Alis na ako, Lex. Bye Cookie!"

Nang maka-alis si Cindy ay naka hinga rin ako sa wakas. Ewan ko ba, ang lakas ng tama niya. Tinahulan lang ako ni Cookie buong umaga at nakatulog naman matapos ko itong pakainin. Wala na akong ginawa noong time na 'yon kundi ang manuod ng anime.

My phone rang at dali-dali ko itong kinuha, only to find out na alarm lang pala para sa consultation ni Cookie sa vet. I wore knitted vest on top of a white shirt and ankle pants with my Chuck Taylors. Ilinagay ko ang aso sa backseat at pinaandar ang sasakyan. Umabot ng two hours ang byahe dahil sa traffic- that almost kill me with boredom.

Things I do for love.

When manong guard saw me, agad niya akong pinagbuksan ng pinto.

"Thank you" I said with a smile.

"Good afternoon po sir."

Nang makapasok ay nakita ko agad yung Veterinarian ni Cookie, yup I know him.

"Alexander?"

"Hi doc!" I greeted him with a smile.

"Let's go inside para ma check-up ko si Cookie."

"Sige." Nakaka-intimidate talaga si Doc James pag malapitan. This guy infront of me is James Michael Alfonso. He told me to call him by his first name, na nakasanayan ko naman, pero I insisted. He worked hard for that title kaya dapat lang na ibigay ko sa kanya.

Ever since I transferred in his school when I was in third grade, I saw him as my older brother ever since. His Grandad and my Mommyla was bestfriends since they were little kaya mas naging close pa kami.

When we got inside his room, he started checkin up on Cookie at niresitahan ito ng gamot. Cookie is pregnant kasi kaya need niyang ichek-up from time to time.

"She's due next month and when she starts whining na parang may masakit sa kaniya at hindi mapakali, manganganak na siya nun kaya you should call me right away para ma assist ko kayo if ever." He said looking at my eyes.

Tumango naman ako dahil sa totoo lang, wala akong pakialam. Hindi ko naman aso to eh!

I was at the counter, buying Cookie's med, when Doc James approached me. Wala na yung puti niyang coat na suot-suot kanina. He's wearing a white polo tucked in his denim pants paired with his Dr. Martins.

Nice shoes.

"Where are you after this?" He flashes his set of white teeth to look godlier. Saan ba pinaglihi 'to?

"Huh? Uhhm. Uuwi na?" Wala naman akong plan after this, besides binge watching my favorite anime series and eating junks, wala na talaga.

"How about dinner with me?"

Okaaaaay. This is not the first time na nangyari 'to, and to tell you the truth, I don't swing that way.

Yeah. James is... openly gay.

"Now?" Dinner at 3? Seryuso?

"How 'bout cinema, then dinner?" He raised his brows, smiling, and waiting for my answer.

"Paano yung work mo?" Don't take this the wrong way, pero I just can't say no. If you were me, I know you'd do the same.

"They can handle it."

How do I say no, when he's so... (I want to say annoying but ehh) persistent?

"Okay." I just don't want to look rude, but this guy has been bugging me for months now. Naghahanap lang talaga ako ng timing to turn down his feelings or anything he's having for me, because ang hirap plus he's already a friend. A closed friend for that matter.

Maybe Cindy feels the same.

"Wait for me, kunin ko lang bag ko."

Tumango naman ako at lumabas para ilagay sana sa back seat si Cookie, when I notice a guy came out of a black Audi R8 beside me, and guess who this motherfather is?

"Didn't know you were into older men." He said blankly.

Napa-nganga ako dun, mga three seconds. Sinong older man? Si Doc James!?

Three years lang agwat namin kaya anong older man pinagsasa I Neto?

Liningon ko siya at sinabing, "I didn't know you were a stalker. Ganun mo ba ako kagusto para sundan dito?"

He took off his sunglasses and looked at me intently and said,"I don't give a shit 'bout you. At ano yan? Pomeranian, really? So gay." I saw his smirk when he said that G-word. ARGH!

"This isn't even mine!"

"Whatever."

Sasagot pa sana ako nang pumasok na siya sa loob ng vet at lumabas naman si James.

"That was Blake. You were talking?" He asked.

"Nope. He's just an ass as ever." Which is true.

"Hahaha, why is that? I thought you two were friends."

As if.

"We were never." He chuckled at my reply.

We got into the mall at five at ang daming tao. I don't like crowded places, to be honest. Pero narito na kami kaya wala nang atrasan. Halloween is coming, at nagkalat ang mga pumpkins na over used na and other decorations sa buong mall, where people are everywhere.

"What do you want to watch?"

We were in Pet Cabin, para siyang mini playground na may mga tubes for pets na pwede mong iwan for a short period of time when you're in the mall. Cookie was wagging his tail and happily bouncing when we left him.

Cute.

"Are you up for something scarry?" I asked.

"Sure"

And yeah, we went for something scary nga. He's the one who chose the movie, it was about a nun who was possessed by evil inside the church. Ironic, but it was terrifying. Knowing how a scaredy cat that I am, ayon, super pikit naman ako sa mga nakakatakot na part ng movie. Tapos tinawanan lang ako ng mokong. I'm sure he's having the best time of his life.

After the movie, he told me that we're going out for dinner. I even suggested na dito na lang sa mall, but yeah, napaka-consistent niya sa pagiging pabibo, kaya I silently sat at the passenger's seat, while looking out the window and touching my tummy whose already having complaints. I don't even know where he's taking me. After seems to be forever, nakarating na rin kami.

AND GUESS WHERE HE BROUGHT ME!

It was at the Antonio's. Potaena ang mahal dito!

"James, alam mo namang ang mahal dito. Sa iban nalang!" I tried opening the car's door while saying that kahit alam kong naka-lock na. Paki niyo ba!?

"Nope. I already made a reservation for us. Don't worry, treat ko naman eh."

He opened the door for me and offered me a seat in a table that has a "reserved" sign. He called a waiter told him to take bring the food na pina-reserve niya rin. The ambiance was romantic as hell, Imma say that. The table was filled with food that was worth thousands of pesos. Damn.

While the music started playing, he look onto me and gestured to start eating, na ginawa ko naman. He is making that landi face again.

"You have something to say?" Sabi ko nang hindi ko kinaya ang mga pasulyap niya. Hindi kasi ako makakain nang matiwasay, scratch that, hindi pa ako nakakakain!

"Alex."

"Yes?"

"I want to court you."

Ay POTA!

Kahit hindi ko pa subo yung steak? May ganito na agad? I've already expected this, pero gutom na gutom na ako!

"Dean. We've talked about this." I call him by his second name when I am serious about things.

"I've tried,Lex. I've tried. Pero hindi ka mawala dito." He said that while pointing to his chest.

"Okay."

Nabigla naman siya dun. I know labag sa kalooban ko but this guy's did his best and he deserves a chance right? I mean, a chance to prove himself?

But to whom? To me? Bakit? Sasagutin ko ba siya?

Taena gusto ko nang kumain!

"Huh?" He said, eyes wide open with surprise.

"I said 'Okay'."

Isusubo ko na sana yung steak na mukhang masarap at kanina pa ako kinakausap na kainin siya, when he held my left hand.

"You're letting me court you?" Hindi talaga siya makapaniwala. Hahahaha same.

Tumango naman ako at tinaas ang tinidor para isubo nang tumayo siya at inakap ako. Hawak hawak ko pa yung tinidor buset!

I'm going to regret this... but at least he's happy. That's what matters, right?

PROJECT BLAKE: Chapter 1 [The Day]

 CHAPTER 1

Alexander Dior Chua

I always see myself as a cat. I don't know why but I am always curious about life, people, and... love. But I don't want to experience that yet, especially the heartbreak part. Because if there is someone in this room who has seen a lot of painful heartbreaks in real life, that's me. From my mother to my friends, I've seen it all.

Even on myself.

"I HATE HIM SO MUCH! Binigay ko naman lahat ng gusto niya ah. Tapos lolokohin niya lang ako? Animal siya! Mukhang pera! Buseeet!" This is Bea, one of my friends whose heart has been broken fifteen times. Yup, I'm counting.

"Alam mo ang over mo, gurl. Pang ilang boylet mo na 'to, hindi kapa sanay? Feeling first time, ganon?" Pangbabara naman ni Jess, one of my classmates. Palibhasa kaliwa't kanan jowa ng babaeng 'to.

"Bigay ka kasi nang bigay!"

"Sabi na sayo eh!"

They keep chatting here sa ground floor dahil vacant time namin ngayon and you're probably asking me why the hell am I here listening to their chats. It is because of this girl, Cindy.

Ang babae ng buhay ko. YIEEEEEE

"Huy! Tulala ka na naman. Anong iniisip mo? Gutom ka na ba?" She asked me nang makita niyang natahimik ako. Napaka-ganda niya talaga 'pag nakangiti. Konti nalang talaga sasabog na ako. Konti nalang.

"Huh? Hindi ah! Kakatapos lang kaya nating kumain kanina."

"Sigurado ka?" Isa! Cindy anuba parang tanga 'to. Hahaha

Ngumiti ako't tumango bilang sagot at hindi ko namalayang nakatingin na ang lahat sa amin.

"Kunting respeto naman dyan! May umiiyak dito dahil sa break up, tapos maglalambingan kayo? Nananadya?" Saad ni Jess.

"Sana all nalang talaga. Hahahaha." Kantyaw pa ng iba sa amin.

"Huy ano ba kayo! Mag-bestfriend lang kami nitong si Alex! Hahaha."

Ouch. Bestfriendzoned 

Totoo naman eh. Bestfriend lang kami. Since elementary pa. Matagal na nga eh. Oo, matagal ko nang tinatago 'tong feelings ko. Hindi ko kasi masabi-sabi sa kanyang inlababo ako sa mga ngiti niya. Hindi ko nga rin alam kung kalian. Napakabait kasi niyang babae, mahinhin, matalino, tapos ang bango pa.

***

After that, pumunta na kami sa mga klase namin. It's the month of October, so marami-raming performance tasks na naman ang pinapagawa sa amin at yung iba magkasunod pa yung mga deadline. Grabe, weekends na lang nga pahinga ko tapos kukunin pa ng mga group tasks. Buti nalang may Cindy talaga akong ginagawang inspirasyon, kundi ibabagsak ko to lahat. Ay joke lang, papatayin ako ng nanay ko pagnagkataon.

"Cafeteria tayo. My treat." Cindy said while smiling brightly at me. Putcha, ito naman siya sa pangiti-ngiti niya. Hindi niya ba alam na hulog na hulog na ako sa kaniya?

"Ah sige. Sabi mo eh."

Nang makapasok kami sa cafeteria ay pumila agad kami. Actually nag-insist si Cindy na siya na raw yung pipila tapos maghahanap nalang ako nang uupuan namin. Pero HELL NO! Baka chansingan pa siya ng mga frat boys ditto, wag nalang. Babakuran ko 'to kahit walang kami!

"Anong gusto mo?" She turned her head at me, at peksman muntikan na kaming magkiss! Hindi pa ako ready mga pre, kakakain ko lang ng manga na may bagoong kanina.

"Ikaw."

"Huh? Ano bat tal—"

"—ang bahala."

We were silenced for a second pero thanks to the guy who serves food, the awkward silence faded. Nang makahanap kami nang upuan ay doon ko nalang napansin ang mga tingin niya sakin.

"What?" I asked.

"Ang tahimik mo ngayon, Alexander. This is sooo not you." Napatawa pa siya sa huli.

"Wala talaga ako sa mood ngayon. Tsaka malapit nalang kaya magsembreak. Do you have any plans?" Please say no.

"Well, pupunta lang naman kaming Batangas dahil birthday ng lola ko. Ikaw?" She stopped eating and looked at me.

"Wala, tambay lang sa apartment." Which is totoo naman.

"Really!?" Napataas pa ang boses niya nang sabihin ko yun.

"Yeah, why is that?"

"Uhm... Wala kasing magbabantay kay Cookie dahil ayaw nila papa na dalhin ko siya dahil allergic si lola sa mga aso baka ano pang mangyari daw sa kaniya. Bestfrienddd, please take good care of him while I'm away. PLEASEEE." Trust me when I say she looked cute right now. How could I say no to that?

"Fine." I have no choice.

"Yay! Thank you talaga ng marami best friend!"

I was shocked when she kissed me on my cheeks. It's not the first time that she have done that to me pero it always feels the same. I like it. She's my weakness.

"I'll just bring you pasalubong when I come back, okay ba yun?" She smiled again.

"Let's go?" I asked kasi uwian na. Tumambay lang kami buong maghapon kakahintay sa prof naming. Wala man lang nagsabing matatagalan yung meeting nila kaya ang ending half day lang kmi.

"Wait, yung sukli ko!" Dali dali siyang umalis sa harapan ko upang kunin yung order niya sa counter.

I was just sitting there, watching her nang mabangga niya ang isang lalaki on the way to our spot. Tumayo ako at dali daling pumunta upang tulongan siyang makatayo.

"Okay ka lang?" I asked her. Of course I'm worried. Papakasalan ko pa to.

"Uh- Yeah. Okay lang ako. Don't worry." She reassured me with a smile.

With full rage in my eyes, I shouted to his back, "Hey you! Say sorry to her!" I grab the guy on his arms, only to find out it was the governor's son.

Suddenly the confidence I had a while ago died in an instant. Yup, I'm dead.

"What did you say?" He looked at me with his cold green eyes. It was so fascinating, I could not move an inch. He had me stuck in my place with his eyes.

"I'm sorry Blake, please excuse us." Cindy apologized to him while grabbing my shirt to back out. I stopped midway and looked at her, "Why did you say sorry to him? Kahit ikaw pa yung nakabungo sa kanya, he should have helped you!" I yelled.

Hindi ko alam but nagalit ako nung time na yon. Is it because of Cindy? Or maybe that guy? I don't know. Basta I was really mad.

"Listen, Lex. It's my fault kaya I should be the one saying sorry."

I did not say anything at hinayaan nalang siyang umalis. It hurts me more dahil napahiya siya, I could even hear the crowds mumbling. Some even said bad words to her dahil lang nabangga yung idol nilang labanos! I looked at Blake's and what I saw made me angrier.

He's smiling as if he found something amusing.

"F*ck you." I mouthed and that made his smile into a laugh, making his full set of white teeth flash on me. Kakasilaw yung kahambogan niya sa totoo lang. Hindi naman siya ganun kagwapo pero ang yabang.

***

I spent that night comforting Cindy, dahil first time niyang ma-encounter ang ganong pangyayari. My poor little Cindy. She does not deserve this, yung mapahiya, dahil napakabait nitong bebe ko. Bebe ko?

Shet ang baduy.

"Hey, stop crying na cheesecake. Papangit ka niyan." Sabi kong ganyan, at oo 'chesecake' tawag ko sa kaniya 'pag kaming dalawa lang. Sana kayo rin may ka-cheesecake.

"You know what?" She stopped crying and looked at me.

"What?"

"Crush ko si Blake."

And for a moment, tumigil ang mundo ko. Para akong nabingi nang ilang seconds  dahil sa mga sinabi niya. Para bang dumating na yung time na kinakatakotan ko.

"Huh?" I said because I know I had to make sure if I had heard it right.

"I said crush ko si Blake Santillan. Or maybe I'm in love with him."

Maybe. May 'maybe' pa naman.

Napa-nganga ako sa mga sinabi niya that night. I swallowed a lump on my throat ang said, "Are you insane?!".

"No, pero since elementary pa 'tong feelings ko para sa kanya. I think... I already love him."

I was speechless. Ngayon ko lang nalaman 'to syempre kaya ang sakit. I thought I had a chance.

"Since when? Elementary? Bakit ngayon mo lang sinabi?" I was sad that time, to the point na hindi ko na alam kung anong sasabihin ko. Sumakit yung lalamunan ko kaya pumiyok ako noon tapos para akong naiiyak na ewan.

"I'm sorry, bestfriend." was all she said.

Ah oo nga pala. Bestfriend lang pala ako. Pasensya lang, minsan kasi nakakalimutan ko dahil sa mga araw na magkasama kami. Mga ngiting pinagsaluhan namin at mga kulitang nagpapalimot sakin kung ano talaga ang papel ko sa buhay niya.

"Okay lang. Wala naman akong magagawa." Which is true, dahil bestfriend lang ako. Taga-advice, taga-tago ng sekreto, at taga-bantay ng aso niya.

"Actually meron." she wiped her tears and smiled at me.

"Your father and the governor were friends diba?"

"Yeah. And?" I was clueless.

"Tapos every fiesta ini-invite kayo sa mansion nila para sa el festí at tanging mga associates lang ng governor ang naruon." She pouted after saying that kaya nagets ko agad kung ano ang gusto niyang sabihin.

"You want to come." Its more of a statement rather than a question nang sabihin ko yun sa kaniya.

"Yes! Please bff! Please. Please. Pleeeeeeesae!"

Napabuntong hininga na lamang ako at tumango.

"Yay! The best ka talaga, Lex! Thank you."

I hate this day. No, I hate him.

I hate you Blake Liam Santillan!